Comments on: Hockey mom? No thanks.

By: Five reasons why guitar lessons are better than hockey — Postcards from the Mothership

Mon, 12 Sep 2011 10:53:05 +0000

[...] Annie of PhD in Parenting wrote a post that helped me crystalize my own reservations – read it here, because it’s worth seeing the other side even if you’re a rabid hockey [...]

By: kelly @kellynaturally

kelly @kellynaturally — Mon, 22 Aug 2011 19:43:01 +0000

I think putting children in sports teams for the purpose of directing them towards a future of “professional” sports playing as a career is a parents’ vicarious pipe dream at best, a waste of a child’s natural peacefulness and creativity at worst. Professional sports are wasteful, violent, excessive, and the amount of money spent on that form of “entertainment” is ridiculous.

Certainly, children should be encouraged to develop their natural, active selves. I’m all for self-directed non competitive sports. Things like hiking, running, biking, swimming, yoga. Great! But there is no need for my children to be in degrading, violent, competitive “team” sports.

It takes a strong parent to stand up to the pressures of team sports; I support you, Annie.

By: Kendra

Kendra — Sun, 21 Aug 2011 02:40:43 +0000

this made me laugh. gotta love capricious use of “commie” rotfl.

By: Kirstin

Kirstin — Sun, 21 Aug 2011 01:41:37 +0000

For once its nice to read funny comments left on a blog post rather than malicious ones! Thanks. And thanks PHD for being brave enough to post this. We live in Aus and I have stated: NO RUGBY! My husband is Canadian, so I said he can play ice hockey (Knowing full well that its not popular here )

By: Lisa B

Lisa B — Sun, 21 Aug 2011 00:57:36 +0000

I feel the same way. I do not want to be a hockey mom. Most especially hockey. I have 2 boys & while I do want them to play some organized sports – soccer, baseball. Or skiing or golf – a more social sport. I do not want any part of football, hockey, lacrosse.
I played hockey for 14 years, my husband played hockey. I come from a hockey playing family. But I do NOT want my kids to play hockey.
There may still be places where the comraderie & playing the game just to play the game still exist. But those places are few and far between. Just this past winter alone my husband read me article after article of hockey horror. When I was pregnant with my first son (now 3) he read me an article about Peewee players having Fight Clubs in the dressing rooms & the coaches KNEW about it & did absolutely nothing to stop it. NOTHING. I was literally sick to my stomach. It was horrifying.
So NO my kids will be greatly discouraged from playing hockey. They can play outside for fun, but really I don’t want them involved in organized hockey. Nothing to do with time or money, but the horrifying “hockey” parents that DO exist. No, not every parent is one, so please don’t get all pissy with me people, but they exist. They existed when I played over 20 years ago & they’ve only gotten worse.
What will I do if they ask, I don’t know, but I’ll try to put them off. If they are persistant, then I guess we’ll give it a go. But I’m hoping to steer them into a different direction.

By: Lisa B

Lisa B — Sun, 21 Aug 2011 00:50:48 +0000

Oh my gosh – that is the sweetest thing I think I have ever read. What a great boy you have there. You must be SO very proud!

By: angela

angela — Sat, 20 Aug 2011 23:46:02 +0000

hmmm. i missed the article.
but i have an opinion.
and i am not a good sport parent. my oldest boy prefers books to pucks and i am thrilled with that. big time. hanging in chapters is way more fun than hanging out in an arena.
how do i know this?
because my daughter is the hockey player in this house.
and while i will never fall into the category of hockey jacket wearing, game screaming hockey mom…i have quietly turned into a parent who supports their kid in a sport that they love. we did not chose it for her. we chose skiing. a civilized, independent sport the whole family can enjoy;).
at 7? she abandoned it for skates, frost on the glass and the smell of timmies in the morning.
and we let her.
and yes, my hockey loving husband, who never harboured dreams of the NHL but does love his Habs ferverently, was/is/will always be thrilled and proud of his ice pounding daughter.
and there is much good in what she has learned over the last six years in a good, level headed house league girls program.
crazy? nope.
detrimental influence??? absolutely not.
time commitment? yes. but no more than any other sport we have looked at. we organize our family around family, and hockey does not control the schedule.
violent? not girls. i can not speak to boys hockey. i can speak more to NHL hockey, which is unacceptable…but my kid does not play in the NHL. nor do i expect her to pull a lindsay lohan despite also loving drama and acting. what my kid sees on the television does not translate onto the ice for her.
expensive? it can be. but we do second hand most of the time, so it is reasonable. and we do not ever buy a whole new set of equipment every year, far from it. and my kid grows. fast.
pompous jerks,lol? um. are we talking high school? i don’t remember. i went to a girl’s school so maybe i managed to miss the whole jock thing. there are bookie jerks everywhere and lots of nice athletic types in my life;).
and again, i never thought i would ever be in a position of *defending* hockey…it is almost painful in some ways…but hockey, in our humble canadian household, has been a positive activity.
but i still don;t want ot be labelled a hockey mom;)
maybe just hockey friendly…

By: Lara

Lara — Sat, 20 Aug 2011 23:42:12 +0000

Lacrosse! Canada’s official sport

By: D.r.E.

D.r.E. — Wed, 29 Dec 2010 03:06:23 +0000

You should be a writer!

I am deathly afraid of skiing, since I made the acquaintance of one too many trees, but I find it fascinating that everyone’s sense of ‘fear’ is different! I guess cause I never grew up with it.

I enjoyed reading your latest post/reply. Now I don’t feel so bad about having written mine.

By: JohnnyKneeBone

JohnnyKneeBone — Wed, 29 Dec 2010 00:07:05 +0000

hey!, we have something in common! , I don’t sit with other parents either, good or bad, I’m not into the blah blah blah , and most are younger than me . Granted the word brats is politically correct for little bitches and assholes… or the male version of little bitches . No they are not neandrathals at least until they hit Bantam or Midget and during PeeWee they exercise their long awaited right to act accordingly , which many have yearned for for several years . Alot of these kids are not stupid and infact can more than string two sentences together very well , some of them are at the top of their class at school .

Obviously you have never sat in the locker room and listened to conversation and likely your kids are far too afraid of you to replay some of those conversations . Practice is about hard work and discipline but really the coach only wants to win and will lie to you and follow the minor hockey rules to please the hierarchy you being part of that , pratice is important because the reality is during a game kids top out at about 20 minutes per game and only carry the puck in their possession for about 60 seconds total within a 60 minute game . Even NHL players don’t carry the puck for more than that amount of time . It’s an unfar sport and kids don’t get treated very well , and if anything kids learn the ugly realities of life through mostly battle and intimidation . I’m sorry you feel offended that isn’t my intention , infact I’d like you to see some middle ground reality . Go to youtube and type in Jordan TooToo . TOLERANCE IS NOT SOMETHING YOU CAN TEACH IN HOCKEY or FAIR PLAY you can only toss kids off the ice for being disobedient bullies for so long , AND team sports ?… well , that’s more about learning pecking orders the hard way .School of hard knocks so to speak .