Comments on: Fox News Video on Bed Sharing

By: Stephen

Stephen — Sun, 22 May 2011 01:21:48 +0000

Heather, my wife was also unable to breast-feed and we still made the decision to bedshare with our son. In the video above, McKenna does not ‘blame’ bottle-feeding, but in his book he certainly makes it clear his opinion that a bottle-fed baby *should not* sleep on the same surface as the mother. I don’t intend to discount his opinion in anyway, because I know he has done extensive research to inform it. He does however reiterate that every family is different, and needs to make the decision that works best for them. In regards to finding of a correlation between bottle-feeding and bed-sharing death, it would be great to have more detailed information about why these particular parents chose to bottle-feed versus breast-feed. Were they physiologically unable to breast-feed or did they make a decision to do so out of convenience or misinformation. Would this have an effect on mother-baby synchronicity. My gut tells me it just may.

By: Flaf

Flaf — Tue, 22 Mar 2011 16:49:55 +0000

Aunt T,
What is it about the scenario that’s unsettling you? Is it that you equate nudity with sexuality? Is there evidence of any harm to your nephew? Is he uncomfortable with it? Is there any other behaviour that’s worrying you?

If there’s not, then in the nicest possible way, I’m not sure that it’s any business of yours what goes on in someone else’s bed If everyone is just snuggled up and sleeping, then a set of thin cotton PJs is neither here nor there. If you have genuine concerns about abuse, then that’s a WHOLE other matter, but just mother and child sleeping together? I don’t see that as any more of an issue as cuddling, kissing, bathing or tickling. All part of normal family (nonsexual) life. After all, there may well be some children who still BF at night at that age.

By: phdinparenting

phdinparenting — Tue, 22 Mar 2011 16:42:31 +0000

aunt t:

This isn’t something we’ve dealt with specifically because we all wear something to bed. That may be nothing more than underwear and a tank top or t-shirt on hot summer nights (we don’t have air conditioning), but we don’t really sleep in the nude.

However, nudity is not taboo in our house. Our kids see us naked and we see them naked. We do bathe with the kids sometimes. From what I have read, kids may naturally seek out privacy and ask may ask their parents not to be naked around them at a certain age. However, I don’t think it is something the parents have to be the ones to push.

With regards to the bed sharing in particular, I did find this post on another attachment parenting blog: http://www.apparenting.com/cosleeping_age_appropriateness_and_nudity_1.html. Perhaps the post and some of the comments there will be useful.

Ultimately, I don’t see anything “wrong” with it, but it also isn’t something we do in our family.

By: pomomama

pomomama — Tue, 22 Mar 2011 16:38:25 +0000

to Aunt T – don’t worry about it too much. It’s actually your nephew who will establish the boundaries himself, rather than cope with adult-enforced ones. He will be the one to move into personal privacy as and when he needs to. But with two open and loving parents, the right channels have already been set up for open and direct communication with him for his childhood into young adulthood. Your nephew will be lucky enough to grow up knowing that nakedness and bodies are not distasteful, and is more likely to maintain an open dialogue with his parents re: sex, drugs, emotional wellbeing and so on. The fewer hang ups he grows up with the better.

By: aunt t

aunt t — Mon, 21 Mar 2011 20:28:07 +0000

i have been trying to find answers. and i can’t find them! you seem so normal to me– and i mean that in the best possible way! i am not a parent, i am an aunt. and let me cut to the chase. my brother and sister-in-law still practice family bed. my nephew is 5. the twist is that my sister-in-law and nephew sleep buck naked. not sure about my brother, i’d actually rather not know. it actually creeps me out a bit. and i feel like my nephew might not grow up knowing certain boundaries. so my question is … is what they’re doing perfectly ok? it’s not really my business i know. but all i can think of is… if it was my brother sleeping naked with my niece i’d feel compelled to say something.

any advice, or point in the right direction of resources, would be much appreciated.

By: Jennifer

Jennifer — Wed, 12 Jan 2011 02:34:53 +0000

I agree with your comment!!!

By: Jessica

Jessica — Tue, 18 May 2010 18:00:34 +0000

I have coslept w/ all of my children – more so the last two than my first. My first was only bottle feed (3 months of breastmilk, the rest formula…she was a NICU baby and never latched on). She slept in a sleep positioner until moving in her crib. My second was EBF. Coslept until she moved into her big girl bed which she’s not fully in yet. My third is a formula only baby — I had issues this time around.

I did a lot of research before deciding to cosleep. I use a sheet instead of a comforter (and will until she’s at least 6 months). And there’s only 1 pillow which I actually have propper up and don’t use. We sleep more towards the middle of the bed then the top. And perhaps it’s because my second breastfed, but my third sleeps near my chest every night. I’m also up a number of times each night checking on her position. I plan on cosleeping with her until she’s no longer happy doing it.

I think that as long as parents are educated then cosleeping is just fine.

By: On Sleep « Mom.Costume

On Sleep « Mom.Costume — Mon, 17 May 2010 18:04:45 +0000

[...] opinion (via popular media, the news, and other questionably responsible sources) WATCH THIS VIDEO. It is on the PhD in Parenting site, which is a really great and informative place for information [...]

By: Sunday Link Love - Alternative Housewife

Sunday Link Love - Alternative Housewife — Sun, 16 May 2010 12:26:31 +0000

[...] in Parenting: Fox News Video on Bedsharing An informative story on co-sleeping deaths with surprising (and yet not really surprising) stats. [...]

By: Michelle Y

Michelle Y — Sat, 15 May 2010 04:30:13 +0000

Wow, Fox News! You have finally gained a little respect from me…though as other commenters have said, the opening could have been a little more balanced. I was prepared to be outraged, but in the end felt good!

And laws, really?!?! Maybe we should also make laws against sex before age 18? I mean, the whole idea of making a law about WHERE your baby can sleep, and being so one dimensional with their message to just NEVER EVER cosleep or your baby will die–ridiculous, and just echoes abstinence campaigns.

Sometimes I marvel at the fact that home birth hasn’t been completely outlawed (though I realize it might as well be, in some states here in the US…)