In the world of academia, there are several subjects that teeter on the line between the Faculty of Arts and the Faculty of Science. In my almost 4 years as a parent, I’ve come to realize that Parenting fits firmly on that line.
I believe strongly in the science of parenting. Science tells me that “breast is best” , so of course I chose to breastfeed my children. We know that it is safest for infants to be secured in appropriate child restraints when travelling in a car, so we purchased and installed the right seats. We know that sleeping on the stomach contributes to SIDS, so we put our babies to sleep on their backs. We know that excessive crying is dangerous for babies, so we respond lovingly to their cries day and night.
But parenting is also an art. The art is coming up with a creative response to discipline challenges. It is developing your own way of bonding with each of your children that fits their personality. It is finding new ways of sneaking vegetables into your picky toddler’s favourite dishes. It is weaving your values into the way that you choose to raise your family.
My approach to parenting has been to seek out the best science and use that to guide my decisions. That is mostly black and white (except of course where scientific evidence is in dispute and then you get into the grey area of scientific bias). But the art is what takes more work. This requires me to trust my instincts, to observe and listen to my children, and to learn from other parents’ experiences. But mostly it involves a lot of trial and error. I find this more difficult than anything else. I want to do things right the first time. I know that we can learn from our mistakes, but I don’t want to make mistakes on my children. So when I figure something out, I want to remember it, to reflect on it, to share it……
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