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Friday
Nov272009

IComLeavWe: Day 7

I made it! I wandered my way through IComLeavWe on speed. Left over 100 comments on blogs, ran through and cleaned up my blogroll, and had a bit of a break from my usual fare. I hope you all discovered some great posts and bloggers through my featured posts and others that I linked to over the course of the week.

Featured posts - Judgment, bullying, motherhood and the Internet


I loved the post identity in flux - again at Working at being a mother. She wrote an eloquent post about being passionate about her own mothering choices, while still still being open to there being no right and wrong. About people being intimidated by her choices and people bullying her for her choices.  She wrote about the Internet and its role in all of this. Here are a few excerpts from her post:

On judgment:
There are people who will wish me ill, question my intelligence, question my reasoning/judgement, question my decision making ability. Essentially my choices will intimidate some and there is nothing I can do about that.

On right and wrong:
There is no right or wrong. Although it pains me to write that. I desperately want there to be a right and wrong. It makes life so much easier.

On being bullied for your choices:
Being told I was too stupid to make the choice for myself, that my baby would die without the vaccines and to stop reading on the internet only piqued my anger and curiosity. It did not make me trust the people who were insulting me, and it did not make me think I should do as they say. It made me think that I need to understand just why they are so scared that they are prepared to bully me

...

It is not easy to make choices that are ridiculed. It is horrible to have people mock and insult you, like what I have seen on the internet. And yet, as in the playground, that is not a good enough reason to just do what other people are doing, just to get the bully off my back

This post spoke to me a lot. I too am passionate about the choices I have made. I too am not always 100% confident about every choice (because so often there isn't a "right" answer). I too have been accused of being judgmental and have been called an idiot. Are we not capable of having a civilized discussion without judging, perceiving judgment, and calling people names? None of us are perfect parents and that is normal.

Posts I commented on



  1. The Monkeys and Me: Well I knew today was going to be a tough one...

  2. Rogozinski Clan: Follow Friday: 2 Lady Bloggers you should check out

  3. Attack of the Redneck Mommy: Pain in the Posterior

  4. WoLFi Tales: Synchronisity - how do you do it?

  5. Working at being a mother: Identity in flux - again

  6. woowoo mama: what our thanksgiving looked like

  7. The Wonder Years: The best kind of compliments I could get

  8. Lactivist Leanings: The Kids

  9. Hobo Mama: Wordless Wednesday: Meiji breastfeeding print **this is such a beautiful picture - check it out! **

  10. Backpacking Dad: Free Anissa (or I was going to comment, but the page won't load properly...)

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Reader Comments (5)

I turned comments off for that post/picture of Anissa.

November 27, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterBackpacking Dad

It is a beautiful picture! I thought maybe comments were turned off, but there were other things on the page that weren't loading too and I didn't see a line about comments being closed, so I wasn't sure.

November 27, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterphdinparenting

annie, i am so impressed by your week! you totally rocked it. thanks for visiting my blog - i answered the questions you asked in comments. ;)

November 28, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterrobin (woowoo mama)

Thanks for linking in to my blog. I replied on the listed post, but I also wanted to reply briefly here. The post was born out of my heart ache as I try to reconcile seemingly impossible realities. Rational intelligent people make different choices. Understanding how people make those choices without judging the choice can be so very hard.

Your blog is essential reading for me when I am looking for information and opinion on breastfeeding and gentle parenting.

November 29, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMamawork

Thanks so much for linking, and for including me in your massive venture! It's been so enjoyable to click through to new finds each day.

November 30, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterLauren @ Hobo Mama

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