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Dear Daughter

I've written a fair bit on this blog about the things I want to teach my children about sex, love, tolerance, religion, death, war, history, food, consumerism, feminism, empathy and more. So often it seems they are so busy being kids that they don't have the time or the interest in listening. I try to set the stage by setting a good example, repeating myself a lot, and just stopping to listen. But there are things I need them to know before they get too far from the nest and I just hope those will sink in soon enough.

My friend Dee (@CocktailDeeva) made a great video for her daughter, called Dear Daughter. It encapsulates many of the things I would like to share with my little girl too and I wanted to share it with you.

You can also read Dee's post about the video here: Dear Daughter.

What do you want to tell YOUR daughter? YOUR son?
« Nine Ideas to Meaningfully Reconnect with Your Child | Main | Outrage: When parents cross the line »

Reader Comments (15)

so totally amazing!!!!

January 23, 2011 | Unregistered Commentertara

[...] This post was mentioned on Twitter by CocktailDeeva, Nicky Frazier Herron and Cherie-Lynn Buchanan, Jennifer Jackson. Jennifer Jackson said: Dear Daughter http://bit.ly/epMDnS #bfing [...]

That video is beautiful. Thanks for sharing.

January 23, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterChristie

Hi !
I loved this video, it is beautiful. The images are heartbreaking. The images of misogynistic violence in both forms - in the form of domestic violence and in the form of
media-imposed Barbie images, feeding into insecurity & anxiety, and different types of self mutilation, anorexia & surgery.
So much expressed in so little time, with great imagery.

January 24, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterKathy Morelli, LPC

Amazing video, thanks so much for sharing! My children are 6 and 8, but we've been talking to them for a while now about marketing. It's never too early to start teaching them that what they see on TV (and in magazines, on the Internet etc) is often not real. We started talking about it when they started watching TV channels that have commercials. Asking questions like "Do you think those shoes make you fly for real if you wear them?" can be a great way to get kids thinking about what they are seeing and hearing. By starting to teach them at a young age, I am hopeful that they will be more aware as they grow older.

January 24, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterFleur (NurturedChild)

I'm wondering what the age of your friend's daughter is. I like the video, but it's not something I would show to my daughters, who are 11. They would find the images disturbing. I think it might be appropriate for an older girl, though one of my guiding parenting principles is not to preach (too much). So I don't think it's something I would ever consider doing, though I understand how it could be very effective in certain circumstances.

January 24, 2011 | Unregistered CommenternorthTOmom

Thanks for sharing the video. That little girl will appreciate the message someday.
Have a great week!

January 24, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterStella

Thanks for sharing, Annie.

There were definitely some images there that I'm not sure I'd put out there without knowing I'd sat down & talked those ideas over with my daughter ahead of time... but then, of course, 14 is far different than my 6-year old. I don't know what she'll encounter and know and want to know about in 8 years (yikes).

I appreciated that Dee tried to get on her daughter's level - like we would with our kids at this age via getting on the floor & playing legos. Going on facebook & youtube = cool (at least in other moms' eyes), connected Mom.

January 24, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterkelly @kellynaturally


I believe her daughter is 14.

Personally, I didn't find the video to be preachy. I found it empowering.

January 24, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterphdinparenting

That video was amazing. It's powerful without being over the top. I have (young) boys, but it seems like something that would really resonate with kids of her daughter's age.

January 24, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterCasey

What an empowering message to send to her daughter! And after reading her blog post, I love that she selected a medium that she felt her daughter would connect to. That's the definition of reaching out. I feel certain that her daughter will never forget this.

It will definitely have me thinking over the next few weeks about what I would want to tell my daughter. She's only 18 months, but maybe if I start brainstorming now when she's a little older I'll have it all figured out? Probably not, but it's a nice thought.

January 24, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterSarah @ BecomingSarah.com

Your right Annie my daughter is 14 years old and in her first year of high school. Unfortunately 14 years old today is so much different than when I was 14 back in 1905...
I have 4 kids and no time to preach, I barely have time to shower...besides it doesn't work.
With what I do for a living and the fact that they see me on TV, I feel it's super important to make sure they know what truly matters in life...and in them.

Thank you for all the wonderful comments and for sharing the message...


January 25, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterDee Brun

What I want to tell my son = Trust yourself.

Watching this video, I tried to imagine how my own teenage self would have responded to such a video, had it come from my mother. I found that I had no idea ... but mostly because I couldn't quite imagine my mother making or sharing such a video with me. But: "I know you will be an amazing woman." That statement alone coming from my mother would have been powerful. I'm thankful that I know that she felt that way about me (and my sisters, too).

January 25, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterRachael

Loved this video! Thank you!

January 25, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterSarah @ Dysblogger

% this is indeed very inspiring to all daughters, :)

love yu mommy!

March 20, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterjhansen

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